DREAMER

There is a strong need in our society to have everything defined without any ambiguity. However, it is not always easy to come up with unquestionable definitions. There are some things that are neither hot nor cold. They may be 'warm'. These things are hard to accept in many instances, but accept them we must.


I haven't been able to come up with an unquestionable reason for the dramatic increase in 'relationship issues/problem' that has occured among my friends within the past few weeks, but I am hypothesizing that the problem is a 'lack of clear or adequate communication'. You know things are bad when even your best friend fails to understand what you are saying. They should, it's part of their job description! I've been trying to explain to my friends what I want in a relationship at this point in my life and no one seemed to understand what I was saying until today. FINALLY !!! *sigh of relief* I think I had been doing a really bad job at explaining myself because all I've been saying for the past month is that I want a 'friend with benefits'. Pick your jaw up off the floor... not that kind of benefits. There will be no sex involved. My friends and I just realized that is what we have all been trying to explain to each other and the men around us.

A 'friend with benefits' relationship falls into the category of 'hard to explain'. It has many different meanings. It can be made in whatever your heart desires.

My girls and I did the best to explain what a 'friends with benefits' relationship meant to us. This is what we came up with:

1. we are not completely single but at the same time we are not in a relationship... we are somewhere in the middle.

2. we have someone to chill with, hug and kiss whenever the need arise. (NOTE: physical contact is limited to hugs and kisses)

3. the relationship has the potential to develop into something more but this should NOT be the intent in the beginning of the relationship as it would be perfectly legal for it to stay in the same place for a greatly extended period and be terminated without penalty if either party decides to get serious with someone else.

***Soundtrack***

Buddy - Musiq Soulchild