I am so confused :- {

So... I tried to post a blog last night and that didn't go so well. I'm kinda guessing it was a sign, seeing that I no longer feel that way...I think. I swear I'm on some crazy roll-a-coaster, this minute in head-over-heels in "like" and the next I'm freaking out because I'm "SURE" this won't work. I guess I'm so scarred from things from the past that I can't move on. There's no form of "coco butter" that seem to be able to get rid of the scars. I really want to forget all that happened and start over but everytime I try something happens that reminds of all the pain.

Last night this was what I was thinking:

" I am soooooo happy. I'm speechless... but this song explains what I'm feeling..."

IF YOU ASKED ME TO (Celine Dion)

Used to be that I believed in something
Used to be that I believed in love
It's been a long time since I've had that feeling
I could love someone
I could trust someone
I said I'd never let nobody near my heart again darlin'
I said I'd never let nobody in

But if you asked me to
I just might change my mind
And let you in my life forever
If you asked me to
I just might give my heart
And stay here in your arms forever
If you asked me to
If you asked me to

Somehow ever since I've been around you
Can't go back to being on my own
Can't help feeling darling since I've found you
That I've found my home
That I'm finally home
I said I'd never let nobody get too close to me darling
I said I needed, needed to be free

(But if you asked me to)

Asked me to, I will give my world to you baby
I need you now
Ask me to and I'll do anything for you baby, for you baby
If you asked me to
I'd let you in my life forever
If you asked me to

*END LAST NIGHT'S POST*

I was actually hoping he would ask me to... but now... I'm so ready to run away so even if he wants to he won't be able to find me.

Now, what I'm thinking is closer to this... (in my own words)

It's so hard for me to open up,
Sad to say, but I've already given up.
I can't believe that this could be,
How could you really be in love with me.

*end thoughts... *

Well lets see... where do I start. Valentine's day was rather interesting this year. I was anti-Valentine as planned for the earlier part of the day but it all went away by mid day. This lady I work with was so estatic because she got flowers from her husband. She said he hadnt given her flowers in nine years and so she was on top of the world. Many other people by who I was surrounded received V-day gifts from their significant others and was glowing and all throught the day. I was so overwhelmed with joy (I guess all the happiness rubbed off on me) that by the afternoon came around I had to shed my anti-valentine feelings. I even started "floating" around too!!!!

I was so "high" from all the love in the air that I decided to tell my crush about "the crush". That turned out fine...whew...Thank God. So now Im waiting to see what happens with that.

Hope you all had a great Valentines Day!!!!

Nahjaj over and out... and still "high" from Valentine's day. LOL!!!!

Metamorphosis

I was searching for a new template for this blog when I saw this pic. It is soooooo beautiful. The artist must be really proud of this piece of work. I think I am now obsessed with this pic. I've been looking at it every couple minutes. If you are an artist and think I am crazy for loving this so much please don't be too hard on me...lol...

What do you think of the pic????