Live like you were dying!

i've been doing crazy things all wknd in the name of being bold. i now know why people do some of the outrageous things they do. the adrenaline rush is awesome!!! (after u get the courage to do it and before u start worrying abt the consequences) but i also now know that staying in ur comfort zone is ok because in the morning even if u have regrets you won't have to worry abt broken bones or a broken reputation. hopefully when all is said and done my bones and reputation will still be in tip top shape! LOL


***soundtrack***

1. Calle Ocho (I know you want me) - Pitbull
2. Love Games - Lady Gaga
3. Live like you were dying - Tim McGraw

God loves you and is with you!

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.

Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall filled.

Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.

REJOICE AND BE EXCEEDINGLY GLAD: for GREAT IS YOUR REWARD in heaven: for so persecuted they the prohphets which were before you.

Matthew 5 vs 3-12

blogging...

if you have been reading my blog for awhile you will know that there are 2 guys that I have very strong feelings for, they are both 2 of my best friends (they know about each other but don't know each other...) and that i seem to fluctuate between the 2. crappy life, i know.

in the past 2 days i've had 'serious talks' with both of them.

friend #1 said we'll only be friends.

friend #2 basically said deny God and i'll marry u.

FML

during the convo with friend # 1 he was describing the guy i should give my heart to, the guy that will do good to me. all roads led to friend # 2.

i dont know why i'm blogging or what i'm saying. but i do know that God and I will be talking abt this as soon as I get to heaven.

till then i'm gonna keep on believing that God has someone in store for me, like friend #2 described "just like me (talking abt himself...) but religious".

Its time....

What do you do when the one thing you need to do is the one thing you don't want to do?

How can you let go when all you want to do is hold on?

I really do LOVE SEX!!!

I've thought about it, dreamt about it, read about it, talked about it with my friends but I can't talk about it with the one I should be able to.

Just like a lot of people my age, sex is one of my fave topics :-) After all it is quite interesting. It's all over, EVERYTHING can be related to sex. Its like ... I don't know... it's hard to explain.

This is a weird post... why am I talking about this? sigh....

Well, I can say anything to my friends and not feel 'weird' about it. But I tried to talk about it with... yeh him... and I acted like a freaking 6th grader (from the days when I was in the 6th grade, not these days). How embarassing!

I also have a phobia of kissing, I'm 20! Isn't that weird?

I think I have intimacy issues...

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Feasting on Soul Food

I was just at my dear friend Scotchie's blog and as I read her post I was reminded of what a great remedy music was for any and every ache, and I needed something to ease my pain so I decided to revert to doing two of my favourite things. Listening to love songs and writing.

So as I listen to this sountrack (Leaving nothing unsaid) that I stole from Scotchie a couple years ago and let the music take me away, I will write about whatever comes to mind...

1. Colour of Love - Boys II Men

Strange enough this song reminds me of Scotchie. LOL. There is a quote that says maybe your girlfriends are your soulmate and guys are just people to have fun with, with every passing day my belief that this statement is completely true increases.

2. Come a little closer- Brandy

I haven't had a lot of people leave me but for some unknown reason it seems like every time I get close to someone I have to leave. :-(

3. The only one for me - Brian McKnight

Yes, Mr. Big... we both know you are the only one for me. "I want still, I always will, cause you're the only one for me".

4. Still - Tamia

my prayer...

5. Trippin - Toni Braxton

Does this mean if you don't fight then you don't really know if your love is real?

6. Charlene - Anthony Hamilton

... you dont know what you have till it's gone...

7. Where will you go - Babyface

This is for you again Mr.Big.

8. Nothing - Brandy

On behalf of my sidekick im dedicating this one to the one that has her heart.

9. I wanna love you - Donnell Jones

Need I say anything?

10. Am I worth it - Heather Headley

Am I worth it? :-/

11. Wings of forgiveness - India Arie

--- same as # 8---

12. Lucky charm - Jagged Edge

On behalf of Daniel i'm dedicating this to Trudy (especially since she loved J.E so much)

13. Crazy - KC & JoJo

I can't think, think about this crazy day

I lose sleep just to daydream about you babyyyyyyyy

I'm going crazy, crazy, crazy, just to thinkin about you lately (crazy baby)

I'm going crazy, crazy, crazy, just to thinkin about you baby (I don't know what to do)

I'm going crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy, thinkin about you lately (crazy, crazy, crazy)

I'm going crazy, crazy, (crazy, crazy) when I can touch you

Crazy, crazy (I'm going crazy) when I can hold you

Crazy, crazy, (I'm going crazy) when I can see you again

(Said I'm going crazy)

think they need some more crazy 's' to cover me.... missing you terribly Mr.Big!

14. I wish - R.Kelly

where'd this come from Scotchie?

15. Why ask Why - Tamia

Mr.Big, you never have to doubt the love I have for you. I am and will forever be completely and truly and deeply in love with you.

16. Supposed to be - Toni Braxton

;-)


***satisfied***

How does it feel to be in love?

friend: nahjaj how does it feel to be in love?

me: it feels like... u know how it feels to be walking on the beach with the sea breeze blowing in ur face and there are laughing children running around and lovers holding hands and smiling at each other? its better than that !

friend: lmao, that was a very random description

I find it very hard to put into words the way I feel when I think about him. The feelings are ... there I go fighting to come up with words that will at least attempt to do justice to the marvelous things I feel.



So... can you describe How it feels to be in love?